15 July, 2010

Demerits for Being Tardy!

Okay, so it's been about a million years since I last updated this blog. Argh! I'm sorry. I’ve no real excuse. But, in lieu of an excuse, I will tell you a little about what’s been going on so you may not judge me so harshly for writing so intermittently. So, when last I wrote, I was having some major emotional reactions to this road I’m on [to get me on the road.] Well, that has lasted for some time. And, while things are still churning emotionally, and probably will be for some time, I do feel like I’ve reached a plateau for the moment. It’s as if I’m in this disposable little plastic bubble in which I have been blessed with a moment of clarity and purpose. It is sure to be bursting soon, but for now, I feel completely and soundly assured of my footing. This whole process of getting my house on the market is taking an insufferably long time, yet I know, at least in this shiny moment, that it is meant to take this long - that there is something for me to gain from this process still.

I have, however, been quite productive since my emotional outbursts have gotten quieter. I now have four rooms in my house that have been completely patched, primed, painted and trimmed. I have another room that has been patched and primed. (It will be primed with a second coat tomorrow and painted and trimmed by this weekend.) That leaves only the bathroom (which has been patched), and the kitchen (which has been partially patched). I have also had the repair professionals replace the damaged exterior wood. (Though, the carpenter pulled a back muscle mid-job, then when he came back to finish, he forgot one piece. He’ll be back tomorrow to finish.) I got myself a small climate controlled storage unit, and have managed to pack it practically to capacity. (Much of this stuff will go eventually, but I’m waiting to see what I’ll need when I get my trailer.) So, things are coming along, if more slowly than I’d originally envisioned.

There have been a few bummers with the progress, as well. For instance, I went away for the fourth of july weekend, and came back to find some of the wall cracks I had patched have already reappeared. Then there’s the yard ... which has been suffering greatly in the intense southern heat and sun. Several of my plants are getting scorched, and I’m just crossing my fingers that they won’t die completely. (You can cross your fingers, too, if you want.)

Speaking of being away for the holiday ... you might infer that I was simply taking a fun (and looooong overdue) vacation, but, alas, that was not the case. I went to Kentucky for a funeral. My uncle’s funeral. His death was yet another loss in a string of so many of late. Charlie’s death was the first, but there have been at least ten others (animals and humans, direct and indirect relations) since he passed. I kind of feel like the Universe is trying to help me remove excess ballast from my life, but is doing so in a very challenging and heartbreaking way. Still, death is a natural and necessary part of life, and I am trying to focus on the lives of those that have departed and celebrate and honor them for their contributions.

My life seems to be getting down to bare roots. I’ve started exercising again. I’m letting go of habits that no longer serve me. I’ve been driving less and bicycling more. I canceled my home internet connection, so have been getting out into the world to use wi-fi. And I’ve been trying to smile as often as I can ... even when I don’t feel like it. I’ve been trying to see the beauty in the challenges. And I’ve been really cherishing the people who support me ... and looking for ways to let them know they are cherished. And, if you’re still reading this, I cherish you, too.

Thank you.

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